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THE LEGALITIES
OF IT ALL
There is no legal requirement in the United Kingdom
for a woman to change her surname when she gets married.
It is your own personal choice, although by tradition
(Asian & Western) it is generally expected that
a woman will replace her maiden name with her husband's
surname.
Upon marriage, there are two automatic legal options
available to you. You can either continue to use your
maiden name or you can change your maiden name to
your husband's surname. If you decide to take your
husband's surname, the marriage certificate provides
the necessary documentary evidence that you have changed
your name to send off to the concerned companies and
organisations that will need to be informed.
TAKING HIS NAME
Changing your maiden name to your husband's surname
is the traditional and simplest option. It is still,
by far, the most preferred (and often expected) option
of today's Asian
bride's, particularly in the Asian Community,
who tend to be more conventional than their Mainstream
counterparts.
With both parties using the same surname, life is
made considerably easier and less confusing to others
when making joint financial, legal and social arrangements.
This is particularly relevant when children are involved
- children whose parents have different surnames may
feel confused or insecure.
There's also a romantic and ideological argument for
taking your husband's name. If you're willing to take
him for better or worse, for richer or poorer etc
etc why not take his name along with the whole package
as well? Hopefully you will feel that the man you
marry has a lovely family, which you will be honoured
to be part of, signified by sharing their name. For
many women taking the name of the man they love and
becoming a "Mrs" is one of the most romantic
and significant part of getting married
With Asian wedding rituals, Hindi, Muslim or Sikh,
based on the idea of a Asian
bride leaving her family and parental home to
start a new life as part of her husbands family, it's
little surprise that taking the husband's name is
the preferred route for many Asian
Bride's. Changing your name doesn't necessarily
mean that you are relinquishing your identity or forgetting
where you came from. Neither does it mean that your
husband will own you, rather it's simply that you
will belong to him (A subtle but nonetheless discernable
difference).
Conversely, for many women of the feminist schools
of thought, for a woman to change her surname reinforces
the outdated idea that a married woman is the property
of her husband. Such people would argue that by removing
a woman's surname, you remove the person's identity,
history and heritage, A counter argument to this would
be that any woman whose self-esteem is so precarious
that it hinges on which surname she attaches to herself
has bigger problems to worry about.!
Essentially, the impact of a name change on each woman's
identity will depend on her character. The new status
represented by 'Mrs' will have different meanings
for everyone, more traditional for some women, and
more modern for others, depending on factors including
upbringing, society, religion, and the strength the
woman's previous identity. Some women could use the
name-change as an opportunity to bury the past, make
a fresh start, motivate personal development and bring
about many more positive changes in their lives
If you decide that this route is for you, after your
marriage, you simply send your marriage certificate
to all the numerous government departments, companies
and organisations that you deal with so they can amend
your records. You will also need to create a new signature
for yourself that incorporates your new surname!
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KEEPING YOUR MAIDEN
NAME AFTER MARRIAGE
If you decide to continue using your maiden name after
marriage, the established convention is to replace
the title Miss by Ms. This option has become increasingly
popular for business and professional women, since
continuity of the woman's name is maintained. This
option has the clear advantage of there being no need
to change any of your documents However, many women
using Ms. for this reason, will take their husband's
surname for their legal name for all matters outside
the workplace.
Generally in the mainstream, the brides who keep their
names tend to be achievers and individualists who
have already established their names professionally
... and see no reason to surrender them. The higher
their education level, the less likely they are to
follow conventional practice. Whether this remains
true for British Asian brides remains to be seen but
a significant number of Asian women are opting to
retain their maiden name.
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